It also seems that we are in need of another care conference with our doctors to give us an idea of what our options may be from here. We have heard the term "trach" over the past few days for the first time regarding Bella. I have started research on this and feel like while we are not quite there yet, we should start prayerfully considering this option. Here is some info on this procedure:
"A tracheostomy is a procedure that creates an opening through the neck into the airway through which a tube is placed. The tube, called a tracheostomy tube, allows air to flow into the lungs and allows the airways to be suctioned.
In preemies, tracheostomies are usually performed when premature babies cannot breathe on their own for long periods of time. Tracheostomies allow patients to be mechanically ventilated without a tube in their mouth or nose, and allow mechanical ventilation to stop and start more easily. Tracheostomies may also be performed when babies are born with conditions that make breathing or clearing the airway difficult or impossible. "
This procedure would allow us to bring Bella home sooner. It could be removed once her condition (lungs) improves, which would hopefully be in a few years. Personally after doing my homework on it I am not as scared as when I first heard of it. It requires much more training on our part on how to take care of her and some homehealth nursing but I know God isn't going to ask us to do anything we are not capable of doing. I would do anything to see her breathe comfortably and continuously so if that means bringing a little portion of the NICU home with us to get her home then so be it. But like I said I don't think we are there yet however as soon as I finish writing this blog the news could change....Another struggle with the idea of the "trach" is that we would have to have Bella transfered to Vanderbilt Children's Hospital- the place that refused to try to keep me from going into labor, the place that gave me the option to abort her but no option to save her, the place that took 7 hours to get an ultrasound done when I had gone in thru the emergency room with preterm labor signs.... This is yet another step in our faith journey that we will have to take, we will have to walk forth in comfort that the Lord walks before us AND I will have to be there with her 24 hours a day while she is there. I know some wonderful people that work at Vanderbilt so I hate to "bash" that hospital but I am certain had they been in my position they would also be hesitant.
In preparation of a hypothetical move to Vanderbilt I am organizing medical information on Bella's history to date. I am reminded, amazed and completely gracious for how much she has overcome in the past four months. Looking at this list of everything she has been thru takes me back to the moments after her birth when we did not know she was even alive, to the weeks after that when we did not know if she would make it and it brings me back to now. Where I sit here today as a mother that has been given the blessing of holding, feeding, bathing and caring for this precious, beautiful girl that was given a 5 % chance of survival. We will continue down the path that God has set for us, we will continue to pray, we will continue to believe and she will continue to be the greatest gift we have ever recieved.
We are also still praying for my Aunt Daisy in Memphis, who is still on the ventilator and showing little improvement and for Maddie, who is still at Vanderbilt Children's Hospital fighting a bacterial infection in her blood stream and the many complications that come along with that. I pray that the families of both can close their eyes as I have my own and feel the powerful peace and warm embrace of a wonderful God.
Much love to you all